_pdra's viewfinder

.desire

2011-12-29T23:06:00.003+11:00

I don't want uncertainties anymore – I just want everything to back to normal and I just want a stable life. No more dramas, please!

2011-08-13T20:29:00.002+10:00

sorry for the impromptu hiatus - thought I should do a little bit of update.

so.. let's start with the big thing.

the big thing is.. I moved to a new place.. not just another new place, but a SHARE house! I never thought I'd be able to share a place with someone but I thought I'd try anyway, since this is the very last chance for me to do so. it's all good considering that my housemate and I each get our own bedrooms and bathrooms, so loads of private space, really. :)

in other news, I'm still in an LDR.. and I'm getting really scared. it's been well over 1.5 year now and we still don't know how long we've got with this LDR thing.. :(

also... I'm in the midst of planning a little something for my future right now... Some of you may already know what it is but I think I should probably reveal it here later when everything is confirmed.. so.. good luck to me!

...anything else I missed out?

.not myself bc of the weather

2011-05-15T00:27:00.003+10:00

It has been raining since Tuesday afternoon and I'm totally unimpressed. Sure, it's good for sleep-in's and all but I'm sure most of us can't afford to sleep-in and be late for lectures/tutorials and work.

I love it when it rains Friday or Saturday night and that's about it – I don't like raining marathons, and I hate it most when it happens on Monday morning.

C'mon sunlight, don't be shy, come back to us, we miss you! >.<

Well, today's weather is significantly better I guess, albeit the on and off sunlight.. At least there was some sunlight!

.this time next year...

2011-05-06T22:02:00.002+10:00

the suburban backyard.

i've never felt so uncertain about life before... this is like, the first time where i have no idea what will happen this time next year.

so.. this time next year, will I

– still be in Melbourne?

– have a job?

– be able to quit this LDR thing and see SF everyday?

– be granted Permanent Residency in Australia? – I have been waiting for well over 2 years now.

yep, those are my primary concerns.. how much of these would I have fulfilled by May 2012? can I fulfill them all? or at least 1/2 of them?

i just want to get rid of all the uncertainties so i can move on and start planning for my future... :(

.possessed?

2011-05-05T23:44:00.002+10:00

:(

I think I'm possessed....... By the procrastination monster..

And I guess this is common among students.. But I really can't afford to put off my work till tomorrow, day after tomorrow, ...

I'm already weeks behind schedule.. And I have to meet up with my supervisor tomorrow – totally stressed out about this because I am not sure if I have done enough over the Easter break.

Argh.. What am I gonna do... I used to be able to concentrate a lot better... Is it the caffeine? Maybe it's the caffeine. Or maybe it's my desk/chair – not ergonomic enough. Can't really switch to better ones since I have limited budget this year.

Perhaps I should spend this whole weekend at uni. Yup, I'll do that.

.just sayin'

2011-05-02T14:38:00.003+10:00

a toy choo-choo

It would be nice if I could have a son one day - I'd love to buy up all the tracks in the toy store and build a mini-giant train track in the whole house for my boy.

LOL, okay, maybe this is just an excuse – I AM the one who wants the mini-giant train track. Not the future husband and son.

.don't date guys who took business major?

2011-04-13T19:57:00.002+10:00

(will place an appropriate photo up later on)

two of my girl friends came over to my place a couple of weeks back and we had a good time catching up and talking about non-final-project related things. one of the interesting topics of the day was "what kind of a guy are you looking for?"

now, this was my question, to the both of them, who are currently single.

one said she don't mind a designer, a non-multimedia-design one.. perhaps an architect or industrial designer.

the other don't mind engineers, or designers.

"and what about business?" i said.

"NO!!!!!" they replied together.

"why not???" i asked (amused at this point, because SF is a banking/finance guy).

"they're cheapskate." "they are tight with money." were their replies.

haha! well sure, i agree with them, but as long as they know their limits, it's cool. SF would only try to stop me if i were making big purchases, like a new camera. but from my experience, i reckon business-guys are better with money management, and they have the tendency to plan for the future earlier than their peers from other majors. the "tight with money" bit does get on my nerves sometime, but 90% of the time i reckon it's great.

i suck with money management, so i think it would be great to have someone whom i can trust to help me with my finances (with the exception of telling me NOT to buy anything).

so yeah, girls, if you're still in uni and single, go to the business school section and find someone.. that is, if you want a comfortable retirement life!

LOLOLOL.

.yes no yes no yes no

2011-04-06T17:34:00.003+10:00

Lens. Time for a new lens, I reckon? The last one I bought was an Canon EF 24-105mm f/4L IS USM and that was 3 years ago.

I've been going back and forth between an ultrawide and prime – the EF 16-35mm f/2.8L USM or the EF 50mm f/1.2L II. Both cost well over a thousand dollars... Australian dollars (we all know how the Aussie dollar has been shooting upward like there's no tomorrow).

TT_______TT

So.. What's my conclusion?

None.

Not getting either lenses for a while..... Because...

I'm saving up for a dream wedding photographer (research done) – I reckon it's the most important element in a wedding ceremony because it's going to stay with you for a life time. I probably won't want to get angry every time I open up my wedding photograph album simply because of crap photography. This will be good money well-spent!

And um nope, I'm not getting married yet – I just want to save up in case it's happening in the next few years.

Seriously, there is no signs of wedding bells on my side just yet! Top priority for us right now is to earn as much money as we can while we're still in our 20's. :)

.because it's time to update?

2011-04-04T19:53:00.002+10:00

yeah.. because it has been a while since i did some proper, positive update about myself. what happened to the days when i'd blog almost everyday, sometimes 2-3 times a day!?

maybe i'm getting old... or i'm just plain lazy. i choose the latter.

hmm.. let's see... what do you want to know? i guess you'll probably want to know that i'm almost halfway through my final semester of graduate school. yes, iamfinishingupmymaster'sdegreeandi'mfreakingout!!!!! this semester, i'm only enrolled in 1 unit and it's all about writing your own project brief and being self-disciplined enough to finish them by end of June. yep, it's actually quite fun to be able to finally do something you wanna do, rather than having to do something according to assignment briefs written by lecturers/tutors.

and what am i doing this semester? umm i'm kinda lazy to explain, so here are the key words: children's storybook, digital story telling, Japanese culture, One-Inch Samurai (一寸法師).

other than that, i do go out for a walk sometime, invite friends over, running errands, house chores, and umm.. well.. okay, that's about it – the rest of the time is spent working on the project.

what else is new? i got a new macbook pro after 3.6 years and am hoping that this one will last a little longer than the last one, and managed to poison SF with photography. YES, he is hooked to HDR right now and got me to pick up a 2nd hand Canon 40D for him recently. too bad he can't have the camera yet, unless he decides to visit me soon.

and what else is still the same? SF and i are still LDR-ing. yep, just like last year, except that i'm used to living alone now.. sure, i still do get depressed at times but i'm able to deal with loneliness better than 12 months ago. my dad suggested that we don't remain on LDR for too long..so.. well, let's hope that everything will go back to normal soon. (:

yep, and that's all. back to work!

.because crying scares people away

2011-03-23T14:53:00.002+11:00

Maybe it's just today, or maybe it has been a while.

But I feel so isolated from the people who are thousands of miles away from me right now..

Sudden, I feel like this selfish person who don't want to help them, despite our close relationships..

And suddenly, I feel like I'm some sort of stranger to them, that they'd rather get help from people who are not close to them than me.

I don't know why so many people could actually choose not to believe me, especially when I'm close with them...

Or maybe this is just a one-sided feeling, that they don't feel like they're close to me while I feel comfortable with them.

It really hurts.. Even if it's just over some small favor...

And now I'm very confused, is it my fault, or is it their fault?

Why am I made to feel like the bad person now?

And worse, why am I the last person you'd wanna approach for help, when I'm supposedly the closest person to you? It really hurts... I never knew it would hurt this much.. really..

And because crying scares people away, I have to go through the pain of preventing my tears from falling in front of people... Is it really wrong to be someone who has got a little too much emotions on hand?

Can someone tell me? Is it wrong to be an overly sensitive person?

.i discovered something new about him

2011-03-04T22:08:00.002+11:00

yep, despite being together for over 7.5 years, we still have new things about each other to discover.

I just found out that SF and I share the EXACT SAME eye-degree!

All these years I've been bugging him about this and he's never told me.. well, because he wasn't really sure.

"So we can share a packet of contact lenses now." He said.

Well, it is the same, but total opposite. I'm -1.75 on the left, -2.00 on the right and his is the opposite of mine.

What are the odds of that! LOL.

.it's time to part, again.

2011-02-27T13:07:00.003+11:00

It's time to leave again, after having spent a good 4 months with SF. I thought I'm supposed to have gotten used to this routine, the routine of having to be separated once every few months.

SF said he believes that this is the last chapter of LDR, which actually helped a little, but I guess I won't feel relieved until it really happens, that we can finally settle down (not the marriage type, yet) and just get to see each other anytime we want.

Sigh, I guess I'll still have to live alone for a few more months..

I really do think I've had enough of school, so for once, I'm actually looking forward to graduation. Let's hope I don't change my mind when the time comes.

I'll be okay, just need to get the "last hangout together" over with. SF won't be sending me off at the airport, which is exactly what I want because I know I'll get all emotional and teary if he does, and he hates it. So the win-win solution is to let me check-in at the airport by myself.

...

Perhaps it's best if Tuesday night comes by asap.

.they should....

2011-01-10T04:23:00.002+11:00

get rid of this rule that says 15% discount for Bumiputra's when it comes to buying residential properties. It's so unfair – shouldn't One Malaysia represent Equality?

I don't even have a photo for this blog entry... too mad to search for one... or rather, too mad and lazy to copy and paste the link.

.the cat is finally out of the bag

2011-01-07T04:27:00.002+11:00

finally.

there is no need to stress over bumping into family friends/relatives when we hang out – because we ARE going out.

but damn... why do I feel more nervous than ever? is it because I've never brought "boyfriends" home to meet my parents before? or is it because we've only officially announced it to my family/relatives after going out for 7.5 years?

or maybe I'm just stressed out about bumping into mom tomorrow morning and have her bombard me with questions.

sigh, I don't know, I don't know. but one thing I'm sure of is that we've done the right thing. my dad's really happy, my mom is (most likely) relieved and we don't have anything to hide anymore. life's going to be so much easier, right? we can hang out anytime, right?

ahhhh... mom, please don't ask me anything in the morning.. everything is fine, if not, SF and I wouldn't have done the official announcement.

.さよなら

2010-12-31T16:22:00.002+11:00

2010..is over??? I'm not dreaming, am I?

I should probably do a little summary of 2010 too.

...

2010...wasn't a good year for me. I was forced by a number of reasons to go into a long distance relationship. I had to fend for myself most of the time.. but this isn't all bad, because I have sort of learned how to be independent... And I never realize how strong I can be until strong is the only choice I have.

Loads of people around me got engaged or married recently, which makes me feel really crummy despite the fact that 1. I know it's not going to happen anytime soon for me and 2. that I should be happy for them. It's not that I don't want to be happy for them, it's just that I can't.

If it wasn't for the change in immigration policy, SF and I could have been granted permanent residency in Australia by 2010... And now, we'll most likely have to wait till 2012 before we get an answer.. and There is a possibility that the answer is No. I hate how this is ruining my plans for the future.

...

Well, 2010 wasn't all that bad. I attended agIdeas, an international design forum held annually in Melbourne which inspired me a lot. I bought a couple of good design illustration books to inspire myself further...and I've got a whole king size bed to myself. Hehe.

And last but not least, friends. :) you guys know who you are..thanks for stopping by for dinner at my lonely apartment sometime!

okay, that is all.

.the end?

2010-12-25T19:00:00.003+11:00

Winter solstice 2010.

2010 came and went...just like that.

I guess I should be happy that it ended, because 2010 wasn't exactly a great year for me.. Well it's good, but it's mostly bad.

Does 2011 mark the fact that things will get better? I hope so.

Will my life change drastically in 2011? I guess so, since I will be starting a scary yet fulfilling new chapter.

And most important, will things go back to how it was before 2010?

No one has the answer for the above question... So I guess I'll just leave it at that.. We'll only find out when the time comes.

I would like to thank those who have been here for me over the past year.. I wouldn't have made it this far (emotionally) if it wasn't for you guys. Cheers, everyone!

and SF, I know you can wait, but I can't. =)

Happy holidays everyone. Have a great 2011!

.omedettou gozaimasu!

2010-12-19T21:08:00.002+11:00

at J.A.T.'s graduation.

dear fellow MMDes,

congratulations for having received your hard-earned certificates! thanks for making studio 7 and 8 such a great place to hang out.

for those of us who still have a couple of semesters to go, hang in there! i've only got 1 more semester of postgrads to go so i'm going to have to cherish this, because i don't think i'll be a student ever again.

good luck in whatever y'all do in future, and keep in touch!

cheers,

_pdra.

.good times...

2010-12-03T09:26:00.003+11:00

...don't actually last.. and because it doesn't last, I'd always get this ominous feeling that something bad is about to take place, whenever I'm in the middle of enjoying something.

There are so many things about me that I don't like, and this is one of them. I hate how I'm always unable to enjoy something till the end, and worry about the bad stuff later on..

Is there a way for me to enjoy the next few days without dwelling on the fact that this "holiday" is ending, and that it's back to reality for us after that?

LDR isn't necessarily a bad thing, even though there are times when I'd get pretty envious when I see some other couples walking down the street, hand in hand.. I pretty much got by 1 year of this by drowning myself with TV drama series.. And now, I just need to find 1 – 1.5 year worth of drama to get by.. or maybe 2. I don't know. Ugh.

This blog is a channel for me to relieve my happiness and stress – I don't need any advice, I just want people [online] to be able to understand my point of view, because no one around me will ever understand what I'm going through.. Sure, there are people who are willing to listen but they don't seem to get the fact that I don't need advice from them, especially since their advices are usually pretty negative. :\

So yeah, I just want you to listen, and not say anything... Comments disabled for now and let's just leave it at that. :)

."a" for "allergy"

2010-11-30T02:10:00.002+11:00

...

no photo(s), i was going to edit one just so i could put it up here but i got lazy.

.....

anyway, i'm seriously wondering if i should continue staying here.. especially through the months of October - December, when my spring allergy acts up.

... it's not just runny nose/itchy throat-nose-ears/sneezing anymore...

i've developed this bad "pink" eye due to the allergy – i suspect it's pollens getting into my bi-weekly contact lenses. guess the only way to solve this is to stick to daily contacts, but it's more expensive. :\

so the sad alternative is to try and get used to glasses. people, if you see me in glasses outdoors, DO NOT make any comments, because i feel very, very self-conscious about wearing glasses anywhere other than home.

...

sigh, my eyes are so itchy, i think i should just sleep. i'll try to find a photo for this post..sometime..erm..later.

gah.

.誕生日2010年

2010-11-11T21:35:00.002+11:00

the birthday cake.

Another year has gone by....just like that. Let's hope I've at least matured a little bit over the past 365 days.

The past year consisted of loads of ups and downs.. Not everything went well, but now, I kind of have this feeling that we're wrapping up all the uncertainties in life...that everything will stabilize soon enough..

But then again, maybe not – I don't want to jinx this.

The best birthday present this year is that SF is spending the whole month with me! In Melbourne! Yes, he brought his work along with him but he will finish up this weekend and we'll spend the remaining 21 days traveling around Victoria. All I want is for us to spend quality time with each other the whole of this month since we don't know how long this LDR thing is staying.

Part of me feels old.. But part of me have to spend a few seconds recalling how old I am exactly.

Anyway, here are the two other birthday presents I have received:

Fujifilm Instax 7s – from SF!

Free Edge Ticket from Eureka Skydeck 88!

And for those of you who are also birthday-ing this month, Happy birthday and eat more cake!

Once again, I'd like to say thank you to those who sent birthday greetings and wishes through E-mail/Facebook/Text Messages. :)

.the letter "M"

2010-10-26T00:00:00.004+11:00

symbol of love.

Over the past few months or so, I've encountered a bunch of relationship status change among my friends on Facebook.

Not one, not two, not three, not four, not five...okay, I've lost count... But LOADS OF PEOPLE on my list seem to have gotten a common bug - a bug that makes people don the engagement ring or get Married.. There, I've just said the "M" word.

Why??? I don't mean it in a bad way of course...

Is it -
A. My friends and I are at the engagement/marriage age,
B. My friends are engaged or marrying way too early,
C. I should be worried that I have not scored an engagement ring (well I am kinda, but not to the extend of stressing out..yet), or
D. Because I'm still in school, unlike most of my friends, who have been in the work industry for a while.

My personal answer is ...... B.

Seriously, some of them are mommies and daddies by now - and they are no more than 3 years older than me.. heck, some of them are actually younger than me.

What has this world come to??? Seriously, I think the perfect age to get married is 27. Okay, so those who ARE ACTUALLY 3 years older than me are doing the "M" thing at the right age.

I've got friends who actually talked about getting married by 18, and having kids by 20 when we were 14 years old... I was probably the only one among them who'd imagined myself to entering university at 18, which happened, and getting my Master's degree at 24 or 25,which is also happening. Heck, who knows, I might decide to go onto PhD at some point of my life.

--

..Sigh..

I still feel a tinge of jealousy whenever I see the engagement/married status in the newsfeed, although my current priorities are school- and career-related. I just can't help feeling a little upset I guess, even though I'm supposed to be happy for these people who are moving on to a new chapter of life. What's wrong with me? I know that We are not ready to go for the "M" chapter but I still feel like I want to be a part of the "M" thing..

Maybe it's normal to feel this way... But still, can someone give me a valid reason or two as to why I'm feeling like that?

--

Despite getting green-eyed about this issue, I still do get offended when people say stuff like "Why aren't you married yet?". I was catching up with a friend recently when he asked if I was having a baby. Here's how the conservation sort of went:

Friend: So when you having babies?
Me: Err, not anytime soon - considering the fact that I'm still in school and not even engaged?? I want to have a stable career first before getting mini-me's.
Friend: !! But but but.. You will want more even if you get to the stage of having stable career.
Me: Yeah true, but isn't it better to be financially-stable to support a family?

And somehow it lead to something about me not wanting to stay home.

Friend: But why!!? You should stay home and look after the kids!
- I got a little annoyed at this stage.
Me: But why? I'm doing postgrads, it would be a waste if I just decide to be a stay home mom, no?
Friend: (sort of ignoring my reasons) but it doesn't matter - you should stay home and look after the kids.
Me: (starting to get more annoyed, but controlled myself) Look, I wouldn't even plan on doing Master's degree if I wanted to be a stay home mom. If I do that in future, it would be like, tens of thousands of tuition fees down the drain.
Friend: It doesn't matter... I would want to stay home though!
Me: (tempted to say, "Then stay home, no one's stopping you." but managed to keep it to myself) There is no way I'm staying home for the kids. I've already come this far and I have lots of ambitions for the future.. There is no way I'm giving up.
Friend: (I could tell that he still wasn't convinced, but decided to stop it here), but.. well.. at least you know what you want.

Like, seriously, DO NOT SAY such stuff to postgrad chicks - chances are, we'll be really, really offended. I hate how there are still males who don't think of females as equal in the work society.

And I still think of the friend as a good mate.. We all don't have to agree with each other 100% of the time to get along! :)

Okay, I diverged. But I think what I've said sort of relates to the letter "M"...... I think.

-end.

.know your neighbours

2010-10-25T15:12:00.004+11:00

Monash University Faculty of Art & Design
Course: Master of Multimedia Design
Unit: MMD5002 Multimedia Design Studio 2
Assignment: Viral Video (& distribution) Project

Know Your Neighbours is a campaign to raise awareness of your neighbours, as well as the people living around you.

Ep. 1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWEccvtd11M
Ep. 2 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tPA_6iaSw5I
Ep. 3 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTTFzw56aEk

.3/4 done (well, nearly)

2010-10-17T22:06:00.002+11:00

My 2nd home. Impressive huh!? ;)

End of week 12. Beginning of week 13. Where did all the time go!?!?!?!? It feels like I was just preparing for my first day of graduate school not long ago.

I'm depressed.. I am...

And I figured that part of the reason why I'm upset is because this week is my last week of lecture/tutorials.. By "last", I mean the "last" of my life. Next semester is project based and we all are expected to organize our own time... That means no class, and minimal interaction with my awesome classmates (some of whom are friends that I'm going to stick with for years to come).

I should be rushing on my never-ending amount of assignments right now.. But having no one to talk to over the weekend, I feel that the only way to unleash all these emotions that I've been bottling up inside me is to type it out...

--

After two semesters of ActionScript 3.0, I feel like I want to do something related to Flash developing in years to come.. The only problem is that I am still struggling. I understand what each set of function does but I don't know how to start writing a code. It's like, I know I could use switch for the main navigation bar of a flash website but I don't know how to implement it. I know I could use the UILoader data type for external images/videos/.swf but I don't know where to start.

And the fact that Apple has allow the conversion of AS3.0 into objective-C programming (iPhone app format) gives me even more reason to master AS3.0 - because I came from a games design background and I really want to do some of that in future.

Part of me really want to design one of those 10-second long, before-a-drama-series-commence type of screen for TV companies, but I feel that I'm more comfortable with Flash than AfterEffects or Final Cut.

So yes, Jeff (program coordinator of MMDes), I really would like to take up your advice in creating a game prototype with AS3.0 for my project in Studio 3 but don't think I'm up for it if we're not going to get any extra help. I know we are postgrad students and we are expected to be "independent" but how do you expect us to do so if our skills are not up to scratch for a fabulous, final project? I really want my project to be portfolio worthy, something I can show family/friends and potential employers with pride.

Perhaps going to one of those design schools in California was a better choice... For those of you who are finishing up high school and are interested in going to arts/design schools, you might wanna consider the States, especially since the current exchange rate made American education even more worth the money, and I'm sure their education quality is much more superior than that of Australia.

--

Okay, I'm outta here. Back to scripting.. I can do this!!!

.is this a sign?

2010-10-14T22:40:00.003+11:00

I've been going through a stage of ups and downs recently.. well, mainly downs..

1. I feel so... vexed..

2. Why can't I start on the business plan, get it over with and start planning for the summer break?

3. My agent has just reminded me of reasons that make me hate renting.

1. Vexed-ness.

I don't know why.. I've been really unhappy recently, and I can't rule out problem.. And um no, it's not PMS.. not yet at least. I feel like I can't smile genuinely anymore.. Is it because I live alone? Or am I just stressed out over assignments?

2. Why, why, why why why why why why why... Am I always procrastinating? Beginning of the semester, I told myself that I'm not going to procrastinate anymore, and that I'm going to finish my work way before it's due... For the past... 8 semester, I've told myself the same thing over and over again.. but.. I still ... fail...

Procrastinate Monster VS _pdra - 1 - 0.

3. ...Just when I thought I was lucky to have nice, understanding agents..... Well, the agent gave me a week notice (standard rule) that they were coming up to inspect. No problem - all I need to do is mop, vacuum and tidy up the apartment a little. I thought I did a pretty good job with that though, considering that I've never had so much walking space before this... My friends visited promptly and were amazed at how clean and tidy my place is.

So the agent e-mailed me today telling me that it's "not clean and tidy, but in acceptable condition and hopes to see better results in the next inspection, which takes place in 6 months.)

Like, wtf!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? I spent the whole hour (or more) mopping/tidying/vacuuming! So I did all that for nothing?

And wait, that's not it.

They whinged about my dryer, which is currently placed right beside the TV (simply because there is no better place for the dryer).. and made the decision for me that I should pay for the installment of a dryer shelf in the laundry cabinet. What..the..fuck!?!?!?!? As a tenant, I don't feel obliged to pay for something that will benefit future tenants. I know I won't be renting here forever - well nobody in this building is going to stay here forever, unless they own the apartment and are going to remain single for the rest of their lives, that's for sure.

I'm sure you guys would agree with me that I'm not supposed to pay for maintenance work/upgrades in this apartment unit unless I damage something. But in this case, I didn't. And FYI, the dryer has been sitting there in the same spot (even in my previous apartment upstairs) since we moved in.. And why did they start complaining about it all of a sudden?

FML. I hate renting. Everyone should start by getting a studio and paying the bank monthly installments - at least you are paying for your own house and not giving the money to someone else.. And the studio will make a good investment in future when you need a bigger space.

Gah!!!

P/S I think I've got another 14 months in this apartment.. Part of me kinda wants to sell everything and find a decent room (with personal toilet) in a share house somewhere.. But nah, maybe not. And sorry for the lack of photograph, I just needed to unleash my emotions a bit...

.self-promote

2010-10-02T10:57:00.001+10:00

.lesson re-learned

2010-09-29T21:32:00.002+10:00

the little dutch lady.

my friends and I organized a little day trip to Silvan for the annual Tesselaar Tulip Festival last weekend. it was a good trip – good weather, good food, good everything.

there were so many kids around and every single one of them were having a great time, laughing and running around. one of us said, "this is such a happy place!" – and it really felt like one.

before leaving the farm, we spotted a group of people taking photos of this cute little girl in Dutch traditional costume. her grandma and mom (?) were around and they were so nice about us taking photos of her!

-------

well, this photo reminded me of the fact of how little kids are easily satisfied with simple requests, such as a couple of helium-filled balloons.. as humans, the older we get, the more greedy we get, and hence, the more we demand.. and take what we already have for granted.

this little girl have, and always will remind me to appreciate what I already have...

and perhaps we adults should learn from the young ones sometime, just like how they are learning from us as they grow. :)

what are your thoughts?

.updates

2010-09-26T14:45:00.004+10:00

tulip fest 2010.

dear flickr-ians, as well as friends who have been catching up on my photostreams,

once again, i'm so sorry for the lack of updates. i don't think i can make any promises as to catching up on everyone's photostreams and stuff anymore, so i'm just gonna say that i'll do my best to update/catch up whenever i can.

my life have changed a lot in the span of 7 months.. really.. sometimes i feel that i've gotten 5 years older in the last few months.. and i'm not saying that it's a bad thing – in fact, i think all these ups and downs that i've gone through have made me a little more sensible than before.

well, shit happens whenever you least expect it to, but i guess it happens for a reason.. everything takes place because of something, right?

anyways, i think i'll leave it here.. i have to get some errands done today. oh and here's another piece of good news – i've got heaps of photos to upload onto Flickr..including the ones taken at the Shanghai Expo in July. i try to get them up asap.. meanwhile... umm.. enjoy your weekend!

.know your neighbour ep. 1

2010-09-01T16:25:00.004+10:00

OMG.. I can't believe I'm in the middle of finishing up my 3rd semester of graduate school! Part of me is like, "yay, I'm more than half way done!" and the other part of me is not actually looking forward to graduating... :\ I don't know if I'm ready to face the real world yet..

Oops, I guess I have digressed a little.. Alright, back to the topic!

We are making a viral video for our studio assignment this semester and so my friends and I decided to make three webisodes based on the theme "Know Your Neighbour". Okay, and I'm gonna need some favor from you guys – could you leave some sort of feedback to this video? As in, what do you think happened there? Feedback is very, very important at this stage and I would really appreciate it if you could either comment here in the blog or on youtube, whichever is easier for you. Please please please please please!!

---------------

.fact of the day

2010-08-21T22:17:00.006+10:00

I have the tendency to go on a photo walk by myself when I'm upset over stuff.. And so yea, I was pretty depressed and stressed out for the past couple of days. Instead of staying home that night to work on my essay, which is due Monday, I decided that I wanna go somewhere..alone.

Eureka Skydeck 88 is my favorite place to reflect.. Guess what? I spent 5 hours on the observatory the last time when I was sad.

I decided to buy an annual pass anyway, since the price is reasonable and it's always good to know that there is a favorite spot I can go to whenever I like.

So there.. This is one of my favorite photos from last night's Skydeck session. :)

.one of my ambitions?

2010-08-10T20:45:00.003+10:00

5D2 in film studio.

Third semester of postgraduate has not given me an answer as to what my ultimate dream job is.

But I know I'm definitely going to stay in the design field for the rest of my life.

Design –> Multimedia Design –> _____???_____

I still don't know what I'd like to sign up for when I leave Monash University into the real world.. It's quite a scary thought really.. I would like to be able to start building up my career within one to two months after graduation..if possible.

So there was this period of time where I wanted to be a film director. It doesn't have to be as big as one of those Hollywood films – I'll be happy as long as I can direct a film, even if it's a series of short films.

And then there is also photography. As far as my skill is concerned, I'm only confident with landscape photography.. And through my own observations, professional event and wedding photographers are the ones who earn pretty easily, as long as they have enough contacts..

I don't want to be an event/wedding photographer.. So it's out of the question.

Motion graphic artist. How about that?

I'm still not quite up to scratch with softwares like AfterEffects and Flash, and will probably need at least two to three more years to master 'em. Not enough time.

Illustrator? Graphic Designer?

But I want to do something that's related to what I've studied in my postgraduate course..you know.. Like something multimedia.

And I certainly don't want to end up in a job that's unrelated.

Oh wait, there is also the whole it's-hard-to-get-a-full-time-job-if-you-are-not-a-resident-in-this-country..

Sigh.

What now what now what now????????

Some of you probably are wanting to tell me to just finish my degree first before worrying.. But for me, I think it's best if I start on some thing as soon as I'm done.

I should start writing up a CV as soon as I finish the semester, and see if close friends/family can get me a few contacts so I could do a bit of casual freelance over the 3.5 months break.

Hmmmmm... And time to think about a domain name for my official site!

.the concept of queuing up

2010-08-07T23:40:00.001+10:00

Expo 2010 Shanghai China: Queuing to enter the Switzerland Pavilion.

I hate crowds. And Expo 2010 was extremely crowded, considering that it's summer break, kids are on holidays, and adults are wanting to experience the pavilions at the Expo 2010.

Summer break + Hot Weather + Obnoxious little brats = Horrible Combination!!!

I decided I'd be able to get through the Expo without too much trouble.. But nooooooooo...

Okay, first, when I got back, the very, very first question I got from people around me was, "How was the expo!?!?"

My answer?

"................. *shakes head* It was HOT, HUMID, PEOPLE WERE PUSHING and THEY KEPT WANTING TO STICK TO YOU!!!"

IT WAS A HORRIFYING EXPERIENCE! My family and I actually spent 1.5 hour queuing up to get inside the Switzerland Pavilion... I felt kinda bad for making them go through this with me, considering that I was the only one who wanted to see the pavilion badly.. But I'm glad they kind of enjoyed the chair lift in the pavilion. :)

Chair lift ride in the Switzerland Pavilion.

In that 1.5 hour, I was pushed by two annoying Chinese brats who are probably spoiled by their parents due to the fact that they are the only children (and sons) in their families. One of them annoyed the hell out of my mom until my mom lightly threatened him, which scared him. Great job, mom!

The second incident was probably much more interesting than the first one. A fat Chinese lady decided she would cut my queue, which probably isn't the best idea because I decided to kick her heels (continuously) on purpose. My dad was behind me and I'm sure he would stand by me no matter what. So that fat lady turned back, glared at me and eventually got reprimanded by my dad (loudly). Haha!

Fat Chinese lady was such a coward that she didn't dare look at my dad. *shakes head*

--

So back to the subject. Just what is it that makes queuing so hard for majority of the people in that country????? I really don't understand. Why push when none of us are moving forward in the queue!?!?

I swear, my impression of majority of the people in that country is...more than bad.

Perhaps this is why I get pretty offended when people assume I'm from China, purely based on my skin color.

--

But hey, not all of them are like that.. I've got quite a few awesome and fun-loving Chinese friends and I think a couple of them read this blog on a regular basis. : 3 So you guys know I'm only talking bad about THOSE people (you know what I mean. Hehe.)

Still, I'd say, go take a look at the Expo before it ends in late-October! If you do want to check out the pavilions, it's best to do so in the evening when there is little or no queue, and not forgetting that it wouldn't be as humid.

--

Check out my Flickr set for all the Expo 2010 photos I have taken. I'll try to get everything up as soon as I can!!!

.love delivered via a pizza

2010-07-26T19:55:00.003+10:00

SF ordered pizza!

A couple of nights ago, I got a little lazy from cooking and decided to have two slices of bread.

Of course, it wasn't enough for me but I really didn't want to do anything that night.

So SF wasn't impressed with the fact that I'd only had 2 nutella toasts... And decided to order pizza for me!!!

OMG!!!

I was so shocked - I really didn't believe it and asked him multiple times whether the pizza was on its way. "Of course!" He said.

45 minutes later, the pizza delivery guy rang the bell and dropped off the pizza, and an additional side dish.

Wow. At that point, I felt like I was the luckiest girl in the world, in one of the best long distance relationship that ever existed.

No, wait, I still feel that I'm the luckiest girl! If only I could teleport myself back just to give SF a hug..

I gotta start planning my next few trips back, so I could spend more time with him.. The next trip back should be 5 months later...

Let's hope that we'll only have to bear with this whole LDR thing for just a couple of years, and stay together for good after.

: 3

.happy 24th june

2010-06-27T03:42:00.004+10:00

toy story 3

Dear SF,

Sorry for the late post.. But nevertheless, happy 24th June! 7 is a scary number, especially for a relationship.. But if we both put in the effort I'm sure we'll pull through.

To be honest, I'm still not used to this whole LDR thing... In fact, I hate it. But I'll bear with it for the sake of our future.

Love,
_pdra.

.canine

2010-06-19T02:11:00.003+10:00

Her name is Kayu. :)

.hello! :)

2010-06-16T02:24:00.003+10:00

I felt like cam-whoring the other night so here are one of the few hundred shots I've taken.
Umm.. I have told quite a number of people about this blog but I don't know how many of them actually read it on a regular basis...

So if you are the few percentage amount of people who reads my blog often, thank you!!! :)

And for those of you who don't really know me, umm.. hi, I'm _pdra. Sorry for the lousy pick up line... continuing on.. I'm currently half way through graduate school and I don't want it to end. Photography is something I do almost everyday, unless I have too much assignments to complete and ummmm... I hope I'll be given the opportunity to live in Melbourne for a long time!

Okay, that's all! :)

.art of airline cuisine

2010-06-16T02:02:00.004+10:00

appetizer and main course onboard SQ238.

I love air plane food!!! Okay, actually, I only like food provided by Singapore Airlines..

Hmm...

Maybe not the raw carrot and cucumber pieces.

.exam2010

2010-06-10T19:19:00.000+10:00

Enough said.

.micro four thirds

2010-06-05T21:14:00.005+10:00

oops, but i like it.

Before I continue, I'd like to announce that this is my 200th post.. So yay! :D

And umm.. I'd like to welcome the Olympus E-P1 to the family!

So why did I get a new camera all of a sudden?

Well.. The Cyber-shot T2's still reasonably good but it's just not advanced enough for me anymore.. I love the camera, but I can't help getting frustrated with the photo quality.. What looks "reasonably good" on screen doesn't necessarily look as good on the computer..

Don't get me wrong, I still love the fact that it's so small, and easy to carry around, but I reckon I need something a little more advance...

I did think about going back to Canon, getting one of those super zoom powershots.... But, things do change.

I went for a road trip with some old travel buddies last weekend, and one of us had the Olympus E-P1. A point-and-shoot (oh okay, not quite) that allows users to change lenses.. And not to mention, the ability to take RAW images, as well as full manual settings. Perfect.

Sure, it is a little bulky, but I guess I'll have to choose between image quality, and size. Image quality is pretty important to me – it usually determines whether or not I upload the photograph.

Now all I need is one of those leather jackets for the camera body.. As well as a proper case - something small and snug for the camera, which would then allow me to chuck it into my handbag without worrying about scratches.

...

..Actually, I have no idea what micro four thirds mean. Can anyone explain?

edited: I highly recommend the E-P1 for any experienced DSLR users who are looking for something smaller without compromising functions. If you need flash, you could either invest on an external one or get the E-PL1.

.友達。

2010-05-31T20:50:00.002+10:00

Tomodachi. My travel buddies in Melbourne.

.i waited and waited...

2010-05-31T20:43:00.007+10:00

Fall 2010 – Alfred Nicholas Memorial Garden.

And you have finally arrived!!!!! :)

I missed you, Autumn. Where have you been all these while? And most importantly, how are you???

Summer had been pretty nasty to me.. :( And I've been thinking of you all these time...

I actually thought you weren't coming to visit this year, because we are already approaching the winter months.. But here you are!!! You came!!!!!!!! :D

Could you stay a little longer? How about negotiating with Winter for a bit and see how things go?

Please stay, because you are, and will always be, my favorite season of the year.

.simple-minded

2010-05-25T23:43:00.004+10:00

august.

I had to go to a friend's friend place for one of my final semester projects when I'd come across this puppy named August. It was hyper for a bit when everyone came into the house and calmed down after a couple of minutes.

As I was setting up the camera and getting ready to start the interview for my documentary, little August came towards me, with one of those rubber bones in his mouth. It wanted to play fetch so I decided to play along while attempting to set up the camera.

Anyways, this experience kinda made me want a pet dog too.. But no, I'm still a cat person. :) And everyone knows that one of the conditions in my contract is that I am not to have pets in this apartment at all times.

If only I was a pet dog who could play fetch all day and not give anything a damn... But life aint that good.

------

You know.. Great things never last... I have fallen yet again, after enjoying myself for the past week.
I'm still in the midst of waiting for the result of my PR application and it has been over a year since I submitted everything to the immigration department.

I know I shouldn't be complaining if I really want my application to be successful and to be able to stay here.. But I really want to have the option of being able to go back and visit SF and my family at least twice a year, without being questioned by immigration officers, for a quarter of the year or something... All my visiting plans have been ruined and I need to come up with plan B sometime soon... Sigh.

I guess I'm stuck here for the summer break.. It may not necessarily be a bad thing, but I was planning to spend the entire summer back home with loved ones and attempt to get an internship overseas.

Oh well, let's hope I'm able to get a 1 month bridging visa to go back for Lunar New Year 2011.

.soon

2010-05-18T00:08:00.002+10:00

autumn has arrived!

Actually, I'm not sure if autumn has arrived... Wait, I think it has, because trees have started turning red/orange/yellow.. But um.. no.. why am I putting on stuff that I'd wear in July, where winter is usually at its peak?

Anyways, that's not important. What matters is that I'd get to go out for some more autumn photo walks before all the leaves disappear.. And.....

SF!!!

How long has it been since I last mentioned him in this blog???

Anyways, I'm going to see him again in less than a month!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!
I'm so excited that I think I'm going to be sick! :x

Okay, back to assignments! Did I already mention that I can't wait to see SF face to face??? =)

.dear mom,

2010-05-10T21:52:00.003+10:00

greetings from 3000+ miles away.

I know that we don't get along as well as we should... And I actually feel bad about being much closer to dad than to you.. But no matter how harsh your words are to me when we argue, etc., you'll always be the best mom in the whole wide world - the one and only person (along with dad) who loves me unconditionally and is willing to sacrifice anything just to raise me up.

I hope I'll be able to go out for dinner with you and the family on Mother's Day soon, in the next couple of years, because the last time I did was six years ago, in 2004, when I was still a junior (11th grader) in high school.

We may not always agree with one another, and I probably will continue rebelling by doing the opposite of what you want me to do anyway.. But.. still.. I'm glad to have you as my mother. :)

Happy Mother's Day!

.fallen into the dark

2010-04-30T05:40:00.001+10:00

sitting in the dark.

Will I ever get out of the dark?

.the fake smile

2010-04-28T23:39:00.002+10:00

late afternoon.

Time to rant!!!
...I hate pretending to be happy when I'm not.
I know I'm one of the luckiest people around... But I'm starting to get very, very tired.

I'm both mentally and physically exhausted.. I feel empty.. Sometimes I wish I could be in the studio working 24/7 so I wouldn't think too much.

I have assignments and homework due on a weekly basis.. And I barely have enough time to do stuff that I enjoy, like going out for some photo walks, discovering new places for photography purposes, etc.

I hate being stuck at home.. Well I have to be at home because I have too much work...

Suddenly, I feel like I have no friends around in Melbourne anymore... ._.

And I miss him.. a lot.. Even though we've been communicating online heaps

But no, I'm not giving up everything here.. I won't be leaving anytime soon. I just need someone to come by for a cup of tea and chat with (counsel) me.. And I need at least two days of sleep in.

Come visit me...

.2305

2010-04-19T23:04:00.002+10:00

I'll find a photo for this entry later.

It's 11.05pm.. While I'm still nursing a mild food poisoning, I'm supposed to be working on an assignment that is due day after.

I'm only half done.. Or not even half done.. I don't know.

I feel that I have been procrastinating more and more in the recent years.. I don't know why, I just can't help it... And this is probably the last thing I should do as postgraduate student majoring in multimedia design (heaps of assignments!)

Hmm.. Anyways, I just wanted to rant. I think I'd better finish up all the Illustrator work by tonight and do all the typings tomorrow.

Good night y'all.

.the first fried mee siam

2010-04-14T23:36:00.002+10:00

fried mee siam.

I have been suffering from a pretty bad indigestion over the past couple of days.. 2 nights and 3 bags of peppermint tea later, I'm well again and have lots of cravings! One of the dishes I'm wanting to eat was fried mee siam, and I have no idea why.

At Info Design class this afternoon, I was craving for fried mee siam and decided to have it for dinner.

Problem is, I've never cooked this before.. But I just had to have it! So I grab whatever (suitable) ingredients I have in my pantry, cut in some chili and shallots, mix all the ingredients together and pan-fry accordingly.

The result? It's OH-SO-GOOD!!! But considering the fact that I haven't had fried mee siam for years, I'm not sure if this is how it's supposed to taste like...

But again, it's so good! I think I'm going to buy more ingredients tomorrow or day after. Hehe!

.mugging

2010-04-12T21:39:00.002+10:00

my busy yet colorful life.

For an in-class exam tomorrow.
I don't want my Postgraduate Chapter to end so soon... But then again, I really can't wait to be able to see SF everyday again.. :)

.happy belated easter!

2010-04-06T16:37:00.002+10:00

an easter surprise.

I was about to leave the house to get some last minute ingredients for dinner when I saw this on my doorknob - A chocolate egg and an Easter note from a nice (mysterious) neighbor.

Yup, it's really nice of him/her to share these with all 7 (excluding their own) units on this floor! I'm sure this gesture has made everyone's day a good one just as it did with mine. :)

Neighbors like this person are really rare these days... At least in my apartment building... And I really, really appreciate the gesture. Perhaps I should borrow this idea end of this year and hang some candy canes on everyone's doors. : 3

So umm, to the neighbor on this floor who gave every unit an easter egg - Happy Easter and thanks for the gift! I hope you're enjoying the holiday!

And to everyone who's reading this, Happy belated Easter to you too, and hope you've received some chocolate bunnies or eggs!

That reminds me, I should go stock up on those chocolates!

.earth hour 2010

2010-03-28T14:52:00.002+11:00

Melbourne CBD between 8.30pm – 9.30pm (GMT+11)

This is my 3rd consecutive year participating in the Earth Hour 2010. It's not that hard really, all I need to do is turn off the lights for an hour.. I wish we could do this every month or something!

I was just finishing up dinner during Earth Hour. Decided to take some photos in the middle of it.. I think I took over 20 shots but only 4 turned out upload-worthy. Oh well.

And after dinner, I dig around for some candles and match sticks. After lighting them up, I treated myself a slice of cheese cake, and watched the candles while I gobble up the cake.

I hope your Earth Hour was just as good as mine. :)

.lecture hall

2010-03-24T10:04:00.003+11:00

HB.36

Guess what? I spent 2 bucks on a lomo camera application for my iPhone yesterday... And for those of you who know me well enough, I wouldn't normally spend all my money on applications – 95% of my apps are free. :P

The image above was taken in digital media authoring lecture yesterday. For some reason, not many students showed up that's why it looks pretty empty.

I won't want to skip any of the lectures, since this is actually my very last semester in a lecture hall, since multimedia students often spend their class hours doing studio work..

.4th week

2010-03-22T17:19:00.002+11:00

Moomba Fireworks.

So this is my 4th week back in Melbourne.. Time really flies doesn't it! Once again, I'm sorry I haven't been updating much, my emotions for the past few weeks was like a roller coaster...

I think I'm starting to get used to this.. Hopefully.. But I'm still having a bit of trouble with time management – I don't seem to have enough time at all! There are always dishes in the sink, the bathroom needs cleaning, half of my bed is covered with clean laundries, the stove needs to be cleaned, etc.. How does everyone manage to allocate time for house chores???

But, anyways, everything about Melbourne is great, except for the food and public transport.. and I'm glad to be here.

I'll update again when I can, in the mean time, I am just going to be spending a lot of time getting rid of my assignments and learning to do house chores more efficiently (I'm so not a housewife material..lol).

.avatar?

2010-03-19T12:49:00.002+11:00

GWK Cultural Center, Bali, Indonesia.

Have you watched Avatar and like it so much, that you would watch it again/have watched it again? What about this - do you have a friend who had not watched it and kept asking you what the movie's about?

What did you answer? Could you explain the movie thoroughly?
Because I couldn't - it's either that I am not good in explaining stuff or I just don't know how to start... And this was all I could say to those who had not watched the movie: "..You have to watch it.. Just watch it and you'll understand!"

...

Okay, this blog is NOT dead.. I've been too busy with assignments and homework so I haven't been visiting here (and not to mention, Flickr) as often as I used to. :(

I miss photography.. I do make the effort to take my camera out with me to uni but I am just too stressed out, tired and worried for any inspirations...

And no, this does NOT mean I'm giving up photography! I'll get back to it...as soon as I can... :(

:(

Alright, time to stop typing and get ready for another day at uni. TGIF? Nope... Not after this whole LDR thing started.

.some day

2010-03-09T23:34:00.000+11:00

.love is..

2010-02-28T06:58:00.003+11:00

being loved.

...when someone patiently assures you at least a million times a day that everything is going to be fine. after months of tears and whining, it has finally arrived.. and i am glad it came so soon.

.double joy

2010-02-16T17:15:00.002+11:00

dual celebration.

Here's a fact for those of you who don't already know – Lunar New Year and St. Valentines Day happened to be on the same day this year. Yup, 14/02/2010.

For Chinese families, Lunar New Year is one of the biggest celebration of the year.. It's definitely a lot more important than Christmas, at least for my family, since we don't really do anything on 25th December every year.

It is mandatory for everyone to get together on Lunar New Year eve for a reunion dinner – no excuses.

My dad likes to have an open house party every year on the first day of Lunar New Year.. So instead of us going out to visit friends/relatives, people would come over instead.. And one of the chores my sister and I were given is to prepare the red envelopes – RM10 in each one.

red envelope preparation.

As for Valentines Day, it doesn't really effect SF and myself since we don't really do Vday stuff (I wouldn't mind if we do though).. And for the others, I guess they would have to celebrate sometime before or after Lunar New Year.

Sooo.. Happy Lunar New Year everyone, and for those of you who managed to celebrate Vday, hope you guys had a great time!

Feel free to check out more Lunar New Year photos over the next couple of weeks on my Flickr!

.some random update

2010-02-03T23:54:00.004+11:00

Seafood night (bokeh).

I was wanting to get a new pair of jeans from Levi's. A sales girl smiled as I entered the store, and asked if I needed any help. "I'm just browsing, thanks. :)" was all I said. The sales girl decided to tag along behind like a puppy anyway, and that made me really, really uncomfortable. I left the store two minutes later, empty-handed.

What do y'all think?

.adding colors to my life

2010-01-30T05:47:00.002+11:00

Believe it or not, I took these shots while I felt really emotional – it was our last night together for a God-knows-how-long time. But that's not the purpose of this entry – I just wanted to share something colorful with you guys. :)

.anti suppression

2010-01-30T04:33:00.004+11:00

the memorable night.

I don't believe in suppressing my feelings, and I don't think I ever will. Chances are, if I were to bottle everything up I'd just end up exploding and hurt everyone.

So whoever (especially those who are very close to me) is reading this entry, I just want you to know that this blog acts as an outlet for me to vent my frustrations, sadness, or things that I shouldn't keep to myself. I'd rather unleash all my emotions in text rather than hurt you, and I am sure you'd make the same decision as me if you were in my position. Don't say I didn't warn you – feel free to close this window if you don't wish to read whatever I'm about to share.

--

SF and I went star sighting the other night.. We thought we'd go about 100km out of Melbourne since the city is too bright. The fact that we saw the beautiful milky way the other night on our way to Sydney made us want to see it again. Heathcote was our destination but SF reckon it wasn't dark enough, and that we should have driven further up north if we had extra time.. But it was good.

I know things will change in the next couple of years... And [sad to say] I don't adapt to changes as easily as most people could.. Seeing the above image hurts because I don't know when we'll get to go star sighting again. It's not that I don't trust this relationship, it's just that I don't trust whatever that is coming up to us in the next couple of years.

Firstly, I don't like being unable to know how long we're going to be apart – he can't promise, and I don't want him to promise as well, knowing that there is a possibility that other external factors may change our lives. So I guess there is nothing I can do about this and I don't know how to deal with it.. I need help.

Next, I hate having to suppress my emotions and thoughts but this is something I have to do right now, for the well-being of everyone. I guess I'll just need to work harder on this and try to occupy myself with as many things as possible.

Last but not least, how often can we talk? We are both going to lead separate lives for a while and it is unreasonable for either parties to demand to go online 24/7. Will we eventually get tired of chatting on the webcam? What else can we do about this other than making an effort to visit as much as possible and interact online/on the phone?

--

And umm, I don't know if I actually feel better yet, after typing these out, but I hope I do after an 8-hour sleep.

P/S – I hope my dad recovers by the time he wakes up.. :( Being sick is definitely the worst feeling ever.

And as for commenting, I've decided not to allow because all I want is for a few people to listen [read] and understand what I am going through..

.manfrotto is the man!

2010-01-27T18:14:00.001+11:00

sooner or later.

"If I am going to be doing a lot of landscape (particularly HDR) shots, I'll need a good tripod sooner or later." This is what I've been telling myself for the past year.

A couple of weeks ago, I'd finally purchased a better tripod – The Manfrotto 190XB with the 128RC head. Great for all kinds of shots, including videos. :) I think this will last me for many years to come.

It's definitely a whole lot better than my old $30 tripod, the one that ruined all my New Years eve fireworks photographs and can't even support my 350D + 24-105mm. We actually tested it out in Heathcote, 100km+ away from Melbourne the other night and it was great!

I got it off JB Hi-fi on Elizabeth Street for $370 (original price was about $400), and got a further 30-plus-dollars back from the Tourist Refund Scheme at the airport.Not too bad I reckon, and the guy at the security check-point in the airport showed quite a bit of interest in my tripod.

Security guy: Wow is that a tripod??? That looks pretty good! What kind of photography do you do? Wedding?
Me: Yeah it's a good one.. Hmm I do all sorts of stuff I guess, landscape, wedding, whatever comes by.
Security guy: So this is Manfrotto hey.. Hmm I think I'm going to get one of these too. *wink*
SF & I: LOL

And the first thing my parents said to me was not "You're back!".. Instead, they were looking at the tripod, looking amused, and asked, "What's that?? What did you buy again??" And I told them the whole story of having-to-bring-this-back-for-tax-refund-purposes. I hope they'll be alright with me wanting to take this on our family holiday to Bali later next month, since they'd always complain that I over pack on vacations. :P

.the overnightmar-ish drive

2010-01-23T13:00:00.003+11:00

Dawn.

We planned a trip up to Sydney and decided we would drive overnight just so we don't waste any time.. Took off at around 11.30pm, topped up the fuel tank and made our way towards CityLink that would lead up to Hume Freeway.

And we drove on and on... It felt like forever.. I'm never a huge fan of overnight drives since I can never fall asleep anywhere but my bed, or a very comfortable couch.. Before we know it, streaks of lights were starting to appear from the right side (east). I was sooooo drowsy that I could only drive for an hour after switching seats with SF.

...

We ended up going through 2 tolls before arriving at Sydney CBD. Poor SF was so angry at the bad traffic in the CBD – we got lost for a bit before arriving at the Sydney Fish Market, our first destination of the trip.

On our way back to the hotel (located between the CBD and Darling Harbor), we missed a turn and ended up on the Sydney Harbor Bridge. Sure, it's pretty amazing driving up there but I was not impressed with having to pay the unexpected toll.. So I'm not sure if I like the bridge that much anymore.. :\

And SF was soooooo angry when we'd finally arrived at the carpark of our apartment hotel. We've learned a very valuable lesson from the nightmar-ish experience – Never, ever drive in Sydney CBD, especially if you are not familiar with the city!!! The train network's pretty confusing but I reckon it's still a whole lot easier than driving.

So there – 24 hours drive in total, 3 cans of red bull, 2 large chips from Maccas, 4 bathroom stops, 2 person, 2 days, 1 night.

.team work

2010-01-23T12:55:00.002+11:00

Together for life.

I hope we'll eventually get there.. And I hope we'll do everything we can to prove to people who don't believe in us.
Wish us luck everyone! :)

.calendar

2010-01-16T00:04:00.003+11:00

I was checking the weather forecast for the next week a few minutes ago when all of a sudden, I felt despair.

We're less than 2 fortnight away from living apart (for a while).

Well this isn't the first time I've felt the strong urge to break down while looking at dates.. But at least I have (kind of) found a way to control my emotions.. And I hope it works long term.

Or.. Maybe it's just PMS.

I am still taking comfort in the fact that a handful of couples I know are currently in a long distance relationship, and they seem to be handling it pretty well, emotional-wise.

At least we know SF's going to leave 90% of his stuff here with me (yes, including daily necessities such as clothing), and that he's always saying stuff like "Can't wait to come back to Melbourne, I hate working there [Singapore].

We have no idea when he's able to return - I've given up asking since no one's sure what will happen in the next couple of years.. Things DO change when you least expect it to.

But for now, let's pray that he'll get a banking/finance-related job within the next couple of months.

.he said.. #1

2010-01-14T00:52:00.003+11:00

Country Victoria.

As we drove along the M31 National Freeway the day before, SF said, "We'll take a break from road trips.. And continue next time [when I come back]."

For some reasons, that actually made me feel good... Because this shows how much he looks forward to coming back.

.hoping for more

2010-01-05T19:51:00.003+11:00

A part of me.

Autumn, or more commonly known as "Fall" in the northern hemisphere, is my favorite season of the year.

But sad to say, I have a bittersweet relationship with Autumn almost every year. It is usually the time when I fall sick for a whole month. What a waste, considering that this is the season for the nicest photographs.

So here's hoping that I won't fall sick this coming Fall and that I will be able to spend more time with the camera this year. ...

P/S Just so you guys know, I have officially moved to my new place and I do not have internet connection at home at the moment – Telstra is best when it comes to procrastinating stuff. ..

.new year resolutions are so cliché

2010-01-02T14:45:00.004+11:00

pre-2010 fireworks at Docklands.

Cliché. So cliché. Almost everyone I know are making a list of new year resolutions... But it's great, and I enjoyed reading them! Thanks for sharing guys - that kinda make me wanna make my own too.... And here goes

_pdra's 2010 resolutions/wishes

#1: Once again, SF and I are definitely going on a long distance relationship..Again. I don't know if this is the last time we are going to be apart or not.. But to ensure that we move onto a new chapter of the relationship, a bridge that will lead us to yet another step which is being together for the rest of our lives, this is the only way. I hope that SF will get himself a much better job in Singapore in the next two months and come back to Melbourne as soon as possible. By then, we should have a permanent place to live in. I hope we'll be able to step into the new chapter soon rather than going around in circles, which is not healthy for the relationship.

#2: Graduate school life: I.Need.HD's. SF said this to me the other day: "You try to work hard [in uni] and I'll try to find a good job in Singapore." So I'm going to put in extra effort in all my assignments and graduate with Distinction.

#3: Be a better cook. I need to refine my curry puff recipe, as well as my almost-famous-amos-like cookies recipe. And I would like more than instant food for bento.

#4: Improving my photography skills - There is always room for improvement!

#5: Generally, to become much more optimistic about everything. Sure, being emo is cool but it is damaging to #1 and #2.

Hmm.. That will do. And guess what? This resolution took me like, 3 hours? :|

Question: What's your 2010 resolution? :)

.holidays 09

2009-12-26T22:19:00.003+11:00

seasons greeting 2009.

Christmas came and gone. And now, everyone's preparing to celebrate the arrival of 2010...

Hmm.. Should I do a reflection of 2009? Maybe I will towards the end of the year, in a few days time....

Subprime Crisis, please go away... It's all thanks to you that I have to endure another few years of long distance relationship..

.merry belated xmas

2009-12-26T22:18:00.004+11:00

.to cherish

2009-12-25T02:31:00.002+11:00

mother & son on a christmas eve.

One of the sweetest moments I've witnessed...

Christmas Eve always makes me weak.. I don't know why... Especially this year since.. Well.. You know.

:(

Anyways, enough negative thoughts! I hope you guys are enjoying Christmas right now. :)

Growing up in a typical, non-religious Malaysian-Chinese family, I've never formally celebrated Christmas before, unless dropping-by-neighbors-place-over-Christmas counts. So tell me, how does Christmas really feel like? Is it enjoyable because of the pile of presents you are getting? Is it because of the family reunion? Dinner? Turkey?

.for savoring

2009-12-22T22:04:00.002+11:00

mon chocolat favorit.

There was this buy-two-for-18-dollars Ferrero Rocher deal at Coles today and so I decided to buy it. I'm not sure if this is cheaper than usual, but I bought it anyway. The deal should still be around tomorrow so do drop by your nearest Coles supermarket if you're craving for some!

Let's hope I won't finish all 60 of these before Christmas. :P

.snap out of it!!!

2009-12-22T01:01:00.002+11:00

Key to independence.

You know.. I just want to snap out of this being-depressed-about-going-on-a-long-distance-relationship feeling. You guys are probably sick and tired of my rantings already and I am just as sick of it as y'all.

And it's easier said than done. Am I not trying hard enough? :\

.inside and outside

2009-12-19T19:35:00.004+11:00

Past and Present.

On the outside, I am a cheerful, fun-loving chick whom most people enjoy hanging out with...

But...

My world on the inside is currently filled with the total darkness - it is filled with despair, pain and uncertainty.
Part of me just refuses to accept the truth, and the other part of me is aware that this will do him, and most importantly, us, good.
But I am going to go with the latter - I will force the other part to see this positively.. And I have to!

I know I will definitely release all these tears that are building up when the time comes.. So let's just see it as tears of joy - that we're moving into a new chapter of the relationship.

.the move

2009-12-14T18:30:00.002+11:00

cleared.

The wardrobe is 85% cleared. We are moving out again after 1.5 year in this apartment unit. It seems almost like we've just moved in yesterday..

Well, this move isn't as bad as the last one, considering that we are just going to move a few floors down. There is no need to pack everything into boxes since we have a couple of weeks to move things down. We have been making about five trips down per day and it seem to be working well! All we need right now is a professional mover for a couple of hours for the furniture..Um not right now, but soon.

The new place looks pretty much the same as the current one. The only significant difference is the color of the tiles in the bathroom and kitchen, and that the study area doesn't come with a sliding door. So that makes it a 1 bedroom, rather than a 1 bed+study.

Good thing about the new place is that ventilation is so much better! That's probably the advantage of having a balcony but that means I'll have to find somewhere to store all the boxes and stuff that have been lying on our winter garden since 1.5 year ago. :\

Anyways, we might reward ourselves a little bit and go on a short (2-3 days) vacation interstate after the move. :D

Oh and I'll post up photos of the new place as soon as we settle down!

.inspiring summer

2009-12-09T22:41:00.002+11:00

Colorful summer.

As majority of you would already know, summer is my least favorite season of the year.. And interestingly enough, I seem to get most of my photography inspiration during the sunniest time of the year.

Why? I don't really know, perhaps it's the bright, vibrant shades of colors that only appears during this time of the year. Everything just seems much more appealing and yummy under the hot sun than any other time of the year.

Oh wait, autumn is my favorite season of all due to the shades of red, orange and yellow but autumn also marks the time when I'd be horribly sick for a whole month. :\

Anyways, here's another shot from today's trip to Healesville - Marysville - Lake Mountain in the Yarra & Dandenong Ranges:

.back for 7 weeks

2009-12-07T12:40:00.003+11:00

I'm back!

It felt weird having to walk towards the departure gate knowing that everyone's walking the opposite direction, towards the arrival hall. Majority of the people I know were heading back home (overseas) for the summer break while I had to come back to Melbourne.

I don't mind spending 2/3 of my summer here, considering the fact that SF and I have (finally) decided to go on a long distance relationship from late-January on. This is our last 6 -7 weeks together for a few years and I want us to spend as much time with each other as possible.

The second reason why I'm back is because I'm moving.......Where? Just a few floors down. Hehee! I told a few people that I had to go back to Melbourne in December to move and everyone said the same thing. To them, moving probably means "relocating-10-or-more-kilometers-away". Here's the conversation:

Other person: Why are you going back to Melbourne in December? Why not stay [in Malaysia + Singapore] for the whole break?
_pdra: Oh, because I need to move house... *Pretending to frown*
Other person: Huh??? Again??? Where are you moving to???
_pdra: .......Just a few storeys down. Heheeee!
Other person: .............. -_-;

Third reason why I am back is because I am hoping to get permanent residency status by late-January... But I doubt I'll be able to get it that soon.. :\ But anyways, here's hoping that SF will get his PR in the next few weeks considering that he has submitted his application few months earlier than me.

:\

.the baby with good eyesight

2009-12-06T09:16:00.003+11:00

spotted!

I was queuing up for the bathroom onboard SQ217 (Singapore to Melbourne) last Wednesday and spotted this baby, who stared at me, and then my camera at random intervals.
Now, the question is, how did the baby spot my camera from 8 meters/26 feet away? It wasn't as if the camera was in primary colors.

I had to pretend I was browsing through images from the camera while pressing the shuttle real quick.. But umm I think the baby's mom noticed something. :P

.off

2009-11-21T21:39:00.003+11:00

Going back.

This should have been updated like, 10 days ago.. But I was too excited about my brother's wedding to do anything online.

I guess I don't have any more excuses not to update since we are all settled down. It's great to have a new family member in this house – sis-in-law. Once again, welcome to the family! :D

And so you ask.. What have I been doing over the past 1.5 week here? Well, let's see.. I've been catching up on food, resting, catching up on TV shows, talking to my family members. My dad missed me loads and he kept saying "Haven't seen you in so long [9 months]!"

I'll be back in Melbourne next Wednesday..For another 2 months, before coming back home again for the Lunar New Year.

Hmmm...... *silent*

Will update again real soon!

.hs for life

2009-11-16T04:00:00.003+11:00

The symbol of love.

Congratulations bro! And welcome to the family, sister-in-law!

.誕生日

2009-11-09T23:24:00.003+11:00

of birthday & sock monkey.

今日は私の誕生日である。Today is my birthday.

For those of you who have left messages on Facebook and sent text messages, thank you so much!!! :)

And most importantly, thank you SF, for getting me this cute Paul Frank sock monkey even though the first one (pink in color) annoyed the hell out of you. :P I'm going to miss celebrating your birthdays as well as mine for a while.. So all I can say is, come back soon, love! :)

.i've forgotten.....

2009-11-08T23:14:00.004+11:00

Reading Glasses.

...How to study for the exams.

Seriously, it has been soooo long since I sat for my last exam, I think it was for this unit called Web 3D Technology at RMIT Uni.

And...It's..So...Bloody...Hot here. Seriously.. I feel like I am 20% melted already. But this doesn't give me an excuse not to study for the exam, which takes place in 4 days time.

Wait.. 4 Days?? 4 DAYS!!?!?!?!? OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay better get back to exam review now.. I still haven't quite understand ColdFusion and JavaScript yet. Gotta read. READ READ READ!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh wait.. I haven't figure out how to study for the exam... Umm.. I'll get by.. Hopefully.

.dear summer...

2009-11-08T11:53:00.005+11:00

Docklands, Victoria.

Dear summer,

I hate you. I hate you for making me sweat like there's no tomorrow.. I hate you for making me moody for no reason - because when I am moody, I'd affect the people around me.. And I hate it when people around me are moody because of me.

I know you'll advise me to get some gelati on Lygon Street but NO, I don't friggin' want to walk outside in this kind of weather, I don't want to walk under YOU!!! Because I hate you!!!

And I also hate the fact that you are here to stay until mid-March next year. Now I have to worry about my camera's well-being, because those babies cannot tolerate heat as well as I can, even though I am struggling myself. Oh, and not forgetting my babies' babies, the lenses.

Gosh.. Summer, now I might have to starve myself for months or get my lens later because of you. I have to get one of those portable air-conditioners because of YOU. You would probably ask me to blame this on the landlord for not installing an air-conditioner for us.. Well I am too, but still, it's all BECAUSE OF YOU, Summer. If you didn't exist in the first place I wouldn't have to suffer like this.

You probably wouldn't be heart-broken anyways, since lots of people still love you for what you are. I might still love you too if you are 25 degrees Celsius and below.

Anyways, before I end this letter, summer, I just want to tell you once again, that I hate you. Nothing can describe my hatred against you.

With little regards,
_pdra

P.S. Oh, and THANKS A LOT for the hay fever. Spring was a lot more lenient with the hay fever so maybe you should learn from her.

.why? just BS!

2009-11-05T01:29:00.002+11:00

I should be rushing on my 3000-word research paper now considering the fact that I have only got less than 23 hours to go.. But I have to type this up before I forget!

_pdra: *gets up and stretch* Ahhhh.. 1,800 words to go.......
SF: *wide eyed* What!? Why so little!? What have you been doing??
_pdra: *yawn* Been trying to type!!! I have done what you advised me to do – expand each points! But still I only have 1,200 words! T_T
SF: But what's so hard about it??? Just bullsh*t one or two sentences?
_pdra: I tried, I tried!!! Gotta stay up tonight.. And I'm struggling to stay awake!!!

Okay, back to work. SF must be thinking that I'm working hard on the essay now since I am typing fast. WHY CAN'T I TYPE LIKE THIS FOR THE RESEARCH PAPER?? I WOULD HAVE BEEN DONE BY NOW IF I COULD! :(

***Will find a photo for this entry later.

.professional procrastinator

2009-11-04T02:08:00.004+11:00

Oh.My.God.

My research paper is due in less than 48 hours time and I am still stuck on 1st draft. I think I'm the only postgraduate student who actually procrastinates?

助けて！！！

.3.5 months till we meet daily

2009-10-27T02:47:00.003+11:00

Last day of the Semester (Monash University, Caulfield Campus).

Where did all the time go!!?!?!?!!? I was just starting to get the hang of first semester and am actually enjoying it!

Sigh.. 1st semester is over.. That means I have only got 3 more semesters to go.. I know it sounds really long but to me, it will be over in a blink.. And I don't want that to happen....yet!

I'll still be dropping by uni this Friday to turn in my assignments, but I reckon I'll only get to stay for less than an hour unless I decide to sit at uni to work on another assignment, which is due next Friday..

:(

Am I the only one who's actually not looking forward to the 3-month summer break???

I don't want to enroll myself in summer units too, because that means I'll get to graduate early.. Well.. I guess the reason why I don't want this to be over is because I have met some really great people over the past 3 months (you guys know who you are!)..

Gosh.. I enjoy being busy! It's so fulfilling.. And I think some of the assignments that I have done over the semester are actually portfolio-worthy, especially the final project in film class – everyone seem to like what we have done! Click here if you haven't already watched it!

Hmm.. All good things have to come to an end... :\

--

But anyways, I have already got stuff planned for the summer.. I'm hoping to complete an unfinished project before uni starts, and at the same time I am planning to create something... *fingers crossed* I don't plan to reveal anything right now but I will later on. ;)

Okay, back to assignments.

.my first encounter with alcohol/drug test on-the-go

2009-10-18T02:37:00.002+11:00

Individual (photo taken in 2008).

..Umm, you know, where 20 policemen's (why do they need so many stationed in one section anyway?) would stand around, holding one of those breath tester thinger to check how much alcohol or drugs drivers have had?

Yup.

I'm 22 going 23 in less than a month. Oct 17th, 2009 marks the day when I'd first encounter one of those things. I had nothing to worry about since I haven't had alcohol in like, 8 months.. Chinese cooking wine don't count as alcohol, does it?

I wasn't worried at all when I got tested, because I knew my conscience was clear (and still is). My purpose of driving today was just to get me from home to uni for a group assignment.

It was just a normal day.

What amused me was that I got tested TWICE in a day, once at around 12.55pm, and another at around 6.50pm, a mere 6-hour gap.

Hmmm......

.you snooze you lose

2009-10-13T20:50:00.004+11:00

You snooze you lose!!!

I woke up this morning without hesitation.. And checked my phone for the time, as usual.

"Oh.. It's 10.54am..... wait.. What!?!? 10.54am!?!?! Tuesday!?!?!?!!!"

"F***!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"*Pinch cheeks* Am I dreaming? Is this a dream????? *Pinch* Noooo, it's not a dream!!!!!! F***!!!!!!!"

10.54AM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SOOOOOOO DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was supposed to be up by 7.20am!!! Especially today, since we are supposed to present our corporate identity stuff to a real client – a CEO, who was coming in today. What the f*** happened to the eff-ing alarm clock!!?!?!!!

A friend from class messaged and gave me a call but my stupid phone was on flight mode! Damn!!! I shouldn't use flight mode anymore, at least not on the night before an important day!

I text messaged my friend to ask if the client has arrived yet.
"okay this is bad. My alarm didn't go off. Have you guys started?" I typed (frantically).
"Not yet. But he's coming at 11. See ya!" She replied.

I dash to the bathroom, washed up, got dressed, and did some final touches. It only took 10 minutes for me to get ready this morning. I dash towards the tram stop right across my apartment, got on the next available tram (even though it was crowded) and got off at Flinders St. Station.

"FFFFFFFFFFF. I'm screwed I'm screwed I'm screwed!!!!!!!"

My friend reassured me (by text) that I will get there on time, because he was slowly going through with each and every students about their logo proposal.. And have saved me one of the very last seats. I owe her one!!!

I looked towards platform 8 for one of the Frankston limited express trains.. Yep, there's one.. AND IT'S THERE!!!! "RUN, SANDRA, RUN!!!!!!!!!!" I made yet another dash towards the train. "Phew, I made it!"

..Managed to get to uni 15 minutes later.. The first thing I did when entering the studio was look for the CEO.. I thought I didn't made it until I saw his back on one corner. He was talking to one of the students.

"Wow.. I.. Actually made it?"

My group of friends started laughing (in a good way of course) as I walked towards their work desks.

Oh.My.God. That was a close one!!!!! And I am still traumatized by it!!!!!! :\

Lesson #1: Never turn off your phone or leave it on flight mode the night before an important day!!!
Lesson #2: Use a proper digital alarm clock. Get multiple clocks if possible.

What a day!!!

But at least there was one good piece of news... The apartment I have applied for has been approved!!! Yay!!! Just few storeys down from my current one!!!

.to click or not to click?

2009-10-10T14:18:00.003+11:00

5 minutes ago, I was attempting to book an air ticket back home for the big day...

And 1 minute ago, I closed the website without confirming my booking.

..Yup, I am still waiting to see if I am allowed to take the exam early.. After all, it's just one exam and I'm currently doing reasonably well for that unit...

I don't know when I will be notified... It's a 50-50 right now and I have no guts to click "confirm booking" on the airline website. I am afraid that I'll jinx my chance badly if I do buy a ticket now...

But even so, I have a really bad feeling about this.. But I'm still going to go no matter what, even if it means being late for my exam on the next day.

I know my reason for taking the exam early isn't as valid as those who have been seriously ill or have been going through some bad personal/family issues, but I feel that my reason is just as important as those mentioned above.

Sigh.. If only the exam date was set a day later, I could still make it back for the event and return on time for my paper...

There's nothing I can do right now I guess, except to finish up my assignments and pray with faith..

*fingers crossed*

.the painful wait

2009-10-08T17:58:00.003+11:00

The black CBD.

I am supposed to be working on my assignments right now.. But instead, I am just sitting in front of the computer, restless, staring at my Inbox and waiting for the news.

The news.

Yes, the news.

I HAVE to be back by the 15th November no matter what. And I am desperately wanting to be there.. For his big day.

It's a once in a life time thing.. I need to be there for him, just as the other family members would.

..But.. This isn't my decision – I can't make the decision. Someone will...

Please let me take the exams early.. I don't care how early it is, I HAVE to be there!!!

.moving again

2009-09-28T16:59:00.003+10:00

We are moving out... For real.

Yep.. So we've only got about 3 months left in this apartment. I know I'm going to miss it a lot, because this will be my last time living in a high level apartment.

I am aware of the fact that we will eventually have to vacate this place.. Sooner or later.. Sooner is better I reckon since I am already so attached to this place.. What I dread is that there is a high chance of me signing the next lease all by myself..

I know, you guys might suggest that I have a housemate. I'm not saying that it's a bad idea.. But I know things won't go well if I share the new place with someone else.. I'm not an ideal housemate for anybody, and nobody deserves to have a bad housemate to start with. I spend a lot of time in the shower, I'd prefer to do my dishes a few hours after dinner (or sometimes 1 day after), I.. Don't want to feel like I have to clean up just because I have a housemate.

Guess that shows I am someone who is better off living by herself..

I'll get over it.. But for now, let's hope I'll be able to find a cheaper place that's as good as the current one.

.the one about credit cards

2009-09-26T20:16:00.002+10:00

Uh-oh.

I have just received my new debit credit card over the mail a couple of days ago.. And yes, life has gotten a little more convenient since!

But I fear for my near future.. Especially when it comes to online shopping.

Better make it a point to remind myself everyday that this credit card can only be used for air tickets back to Singapore and City Link payments.

.double trouble

2009-09-17T23:04:00.002+10:00

Trouble [on Victoria Street, Melbourne].

SF and I were in the middle of hanging our laundries when all of a sudden, he said, "Wow look! There's a car accident there [by Victoria Street].. And there's even a police car!"

And we stopped what we were doing and checked out the scene from our apartment's winter garden. "Where's your telephoto zoom lens?" SF asked. "I wanna zoom in on the camera and see what's going on."

I went and grab my 350D with the EF-S 55-250mm attached. Took a few photos before passing it to SF, who started commenting on stuff while he looked through the camera's viewfinder.

Hmm.. Interesting. Part of me was intrigued by the car accident, and part of me felt sorry for those involved. - they probably stood under the rain for an hour or something. :\

So.. Here are the questions.. by SF and me.

1. What did that blue car do!?!? How did the driver end up in the lane that's going opposite direction!?

2. Seriously, was it really necessary for the authorities to block 2 - 3 lanes on Victoria Street? I mean, it was peak hour and there's always traffic congestion on Victoria St. at around this time every weekday.

Tell us what you think!

._pdra on twitter

2009-09-17T13:48:00.004+10:00

Okay, here's another post that's quite unrelated to photography.

Are you guys on Twitter? I think everyone's on Twitter these days yea? If not umm, you should go sign up for one, so that you can follow me! :P

I was one of the earliest people to own a Twitter account I think. I don't remember how I'd heard of this 140-letter update thingamagy. All I remember was that... It was during the summer break (sometime late-January 2007). I was bored.. And was surfing the internet that night, as usual.

And then I came across Twitter.. Once again, I was bored.. So I decided to sign up for fun. As of today, I have updated 2,419 times on Twitter since 2.8 years ago. :)

So, if you do want to follow me (and listen to my daily rants in 140 letters, click on the image below and Follow. :) I'll also announce new blog posts whenever I update.. So.. Do it now! Follow me!

.that sneaky dude in uni

2009-09-15T16:26:00.003+10:00

Building G (Art & Design building), Monash Uni (Caulfield Campus)

Now, before you start assuming that I am here to complain about my life, I would like to let you know that I am not going to complain about uni life. I love uni! My new friends are really awesome and we click really well, and.. Well, generally, life is very fulfilling for me right now!

But.. You know, life is never always perfect.. No matter how hard you try.. Like SF said, "Life is not all fairy tale." .. I guess he is right.

*Ahem* okay, back to the topic, about that sneaky dude in 2 of my classes.. Some of you may not what I am talking about... But for those of you who don't, fear not - because I am going to tell you what's going on. First, I don't know if that dude is going to read this entry, chances are, no, because I don't think he knows about my blog.

This is a guy who has been staring at me since the beginning of the semester. Initially, I thought he was just some friendly guy in class so I smiled back whenever he smiles and greets me.. But after a while, I started feeling uncomfortable. "Why would someone smile at another person for over 5 seconds?" I thought.

Week 3 - He came up to me to grab files that I have copied off the tutor's desktop in studio even though his friends (with the same files) were right beside him... And again, he smiled at me for 5.. no, 10 seconds.

Week 4 - I was doing my own things (alone) and he came and talk to me... You would probably think it's just a casual chat, that he wants to me friends.. But I don't feel this way. I felt uncomfortable. Judging from the way he behaved and looked at me, it's very obvious to me that he wants to be more than friends.

Week 5 - He stared at me while I handed my hard drive to the tutor, so that he could play the video clip (an assignment for that class).. I wasn't looking at him but I could tell he was smiling at me from the side of my eyes. I was greatly annoyed but didn't do anything - all I did was avoid eye contact with him. Later, he came and talk to me about my assignment, asked me what I did during my free time and when I announced that I spend time with my other half, he looked disappointed for a second and tried to hide it. "Friends don't get disappointed when they find out you are taken.", said one of my friends.

Week 6 - I ignored him when he called out my name. My friends thought that was funny, LOL.

Week 7 & 8 - Peace.

Week 9 (this week) - I was waiting for my friend when he saw me sitting alone by myself. I did not look at him, and that I was reading a novel and listening to my iPod. From the side of my eyes, I could see he was looking around (sneakily), probably to see if my friends were coming and decided it was actually safe to talk to me. The moment he called my name, I stood up and said, "I gotta go." and dash away. I didn't know where to go, so I thought I'd go back to the studio. I called my friend (the one I was waiting for) and asked where she was.

---

I wasn't sure if I was overreacting, so I kept quiet for a while.. I didn't want my friends to think I'm complaining too much...

I knew I had to tell someone in uni.. So I decided to tell my friends one day.. I was sooooo relieved when they agreed with my thoughts and assured me that I wasn't thinking too much.

Well, back to present. I went and look for the friend, who was in one of the labs with another one of our friends and I wasted no time telling them about what happened. "OMG, are you okay? You look flushed." She commented. I admitted to both of them that I felt very, very vulnerable. :\

My friend asked if I needed her company or something but knowing that she is rushing for an assignment due this Friday, I said I'll be okay alone, and that I'll let her know if anything happens. She suggested that I pretend to talk on the phone if I do see that sneaky dude somewhere. Thank God I didn't see him anywhere.

Okay, now, do you think I am over reacting? I am absolutely sure that it is natural instinct for one to avoid someone else who makes him/her uncomfortable. I hate conflicts, that's why I am choosing to "ignore" rather than "confront".

All I need to do now is to bear with this for a few more weeks.. And hope that we don't share the same class next semester.

.9/11

2009-09-13T03:01:00.003+10:00

911

9/11 - Never forget.

And I've only got about 4 months of cherishing-our-time-together to do. Sigh..

.the one about cooking

2009-09-09T20:10:00.002+10:00

Makizushi.

Chances are, our mothers have been taught to cook and sew at a very young age.... And umm chances are, they didn't have much education opportunities, like us. :\

"You cannot handle [cooking this/that]!!!" Or "You don't know how to prepare/cook [this/that]!!!", are comments by SF, whenever I try to attempt some advance cooking, like deep frying chicken wings.. Haha, alright, alright, I know he meant well, and that he didn't want me to get my hands burnt while cooking..

And that got me thinking. How many girls my age can actually cook as well as my mom can? I would say not a lot, since we have all pretty much spent our childhood learning math and science in school, and not to mention, homework.

If I could cook and sew, I wouldn't be sitting here typing up a blog entry.. I would probably be making desserts or mending some broken tops or bottoms.

So, let's see, how many of you can cook as well as your mothers or grandmothers, and can hand make clothings? :P

Oh but umm I do know a couple of friends who can cook and/or sew really well! You girls (and guys) know who you are! :)

--

Wait, I know how to make delicious sushi's (see above image).. And chocolate muffins! Does that count? :D

.medicine

2009-09-06T15:27:00.002+10:00

Pills.

My throat felt funny last Tuesday morning, when I woke up and got ready for uni. I instantly knew that I was coming down with a flu. I decided against resting at home since I wasn't contagious.. Yet. I felt the same on Wednesday morning and decided to go to class as well.

The runny nose came in early Thursday morning, when I woke up to use the bathroom. I knew it was time anyways, because the flu bug normally visits every 8 to 9 months. So I stayed home on Thursday and Friday..

Truth is, I didn't want to miss out on lectures/studios/tutorials too much. But since we are all advised to stay isolated at home while we are sick, I decided I didn't want to risk getting my classmates and tutor infected and so I thought I should stay out of class on Friday. :(

--

I am definitely going to uni tomorrow.. And umm don't worry people, I have since recovered from the flu. Can't wait till Monday, which starts in 8.5 hours time!

.when money matters

2009-09-06T13:30:00.003+10:00

Yes, it's true that money cannot buy you happiness...

But think about it. Without money, you can't buy stuff that you want, stuff that will make you happy. How are you going to be happy knowing that you cannot own something dear without having the money?

For us, it goes like this.

Without a career, there will not be money.. And without money, we cannot build a future together.

I know I have to let go and accept the truth of going on a long distance relationship, because there is nothing we can do about the sub prime crisis. It's way beyond our control, because it's not even our fault to begin with.

So _pdra, long distance = a great future for you and SF ahead. no long distance = no money, no happiness, no future.

Which one would you choose, _pdra?

My selfishness is jeopardizing a successful long-term relationship and yet, I find it impossible to get rid of that self-centered monster inside me. I guess the reason why I feel forced about this whole situation is because I hate it when something well-planned has to be changed all of a sudden.

I hate to think about how I am going to be living alone from next year, for a few years. How long is a few years? Well, nobody can answer that right now. I wish I had an answer, an answer like, "I will be back in about 2 years time, really really, soon."

Question: Do you think you can still buy happiness without money?

.how to sign up for interim semester - Singapore American School

2009-09-05T16:17:00.003+10:00

Video by DaveDaranjo. This was taken at my high school back in 2001, 6 months before I enrolled into the school.

Taking a little bit of a break from photo blogging but don't worry, I will blog again shortly (like in two days time).

I miss interim semester! I can still remember my last interim trip to Japan and it was probably one of the best times of my life. Can't believe I actually graduated 1 semester early just so I could come to Melbourne -- It's not like I wasn't going to be able to move downunder six months later or something. :\

.spring has come

2009-09-03T17:29:00.003+10:00

桜

Waking up early in the morning had been quite a challenge for the past couple of months.. And it still is...

Because I live in Melbourne... And Melbourne is generally much colder than any other cities in Australia.

So yesterday morning had been pretty cold, as always, I woke up, got dressed, made myself a lunchbox and and left.

...

When I stepped out of uni at around 1pm, it felt different. "It's freaking hot for a wint.. Oh wait, this is the first week of spring!" I thought. Spring has come. It really has. Majority of the people around me only had a thin sweater on while I was in my ultra-thick winter jacket and beanie. It felt awkward. :\

I think it's time to put those winter stuff away for 9 months.. And endure the bitter wind in the morning for a while.

I don't really like this whole transition from winter to spring because it makes it difficult to decide what to put on in the morning!

What do you think about this seasonal transition? Any advice?

.attack within the inside

2009-08-27T19:48:00.007+10:00

Messed up in a good way.

It's happening again.......... Approximately an hour ago, I developed this sudden panic attack and it lasted for about an hour, until I put on my headphone and turned on the iPod...

I'm still feeling a little anxious, but it's getting better. What's happening though? I'm not particularly worried about anything other than my assignments.. And I think I am on track, not falling behind or anything.

Why???????

All I know is that.. I'm scared.